Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Mending and Updating

I know several of my loyal followers have been concerned about what has been happening with Linda and me because you have left comments or written to me directly. I appreciate the support and input. The suggestions have been taken to heart and have led to several discussions between Linda and me. That is why there has been a delay in my blog updating the last two weeks. I will attempt to bring things up to date.

Like many of you, I was concerned at the direction our relationship seemed to be taking. I have always enjoyed my cross-dressing, especially when Linda got involved with it. However, I had felt that it should be private and kept to just the two of us. I wasn’t too upset when Linda told one or two of her friends about it as I knew she needed an outlet to talk about her feelings. Plus, it was kind of fun being dressed up in front of supportive women. But then their husbands found out and suddenly my secret was no longer secret. When my mother and sister found out about Beverly I knew that they wouldn’t be too surprised as I had been caught when I was young trying on their things. Linda confided in her sister because they were close, and before I knew it our families knew about Beverly. It just seemed to be mushrooming out of control. My private life was now open to more and more people. While I enjoyed the ever-increasing opportunities to dress up, there was a big price to pay for that privilege. And as they say, you can’t put the genie back into the bottle.

Linda and I sat down over several days to discuss my concerns. We shared what we were feeling and where we thought this was going. I enjoy my role as her wife and my responsibilities of housework, cooking, and laundry, and I don’t want that to end. Working out the home affords me the opportunity to indulge my role-playing and still earn a living. Linda loves the release from typical “wifely duties” and being able to come home from work to a clean house and a hot meal. Neither of us want to lose that.

My main concerns were how to control who finds out about my crossdressing, if it is even possible to control that any more, and where our love life was headed. I enjoy sex with Linda too much to give that up. I am willing to put up with her having occasional sexual relationships, like with Darryl, since I enjoy the cuckold fantasy. I do not want her to replace our sexual relationship with one where she is exclusive to someone else. Fortunately, Linda agrees with me and said that she has missed our intimacy as much as I have and wants to get that corrected. She enjoyed denying me because she could tell that I was enjoying the fantasy as well.

Linda confessed that she enjoyed sex with Darryl and the dates they had, but she doesn’t want him to replace me. We both agreed that the two of them going on dates when he is here would be fine. I expressed my concern about others finding out about those dates and how it could cause problems for us. Our solution is for those dates to be kept to our house as much as possible. Linda got me to agree that she and Darryl could meet sometime some place away from here where there would be little chance of running into someone we know. She mentioned the Las Vegas trip idea where the two of them would go there for a few days sometime. We decided to put that on the backburner until our marriage was back on firmer footings again. Darryl isn’t expected to be coming to Iowa until later this summer so that should give us some ‘healing’ time.

Linda also agreed to talk to Darryl and to try to reel him and his ideas in. He had been talking to her about him taking more control over our lives. He wanted her to be exclusive to him sexually, to the point of cutting me off sexually from her. She is going to tell him that is not possible or of interest to her. Linda is going to tell him that our marriage comes first and that their relationship must take a backseat to it. Not sure how he will react to that.

I asked her about Darryl’s idea of her getting a tattoo for him. She told me that a part of her thought it was a hot idea and that it might be fun, if it was placed somewhere where it wouldn’t show. But that is also going to be put on hold for the time being. However, she suggested that I/Beverly might enjoy getting a ‘cute little tattoo’ as well. Not sure about that.

Then we talked about Darryl’s idea of me dating men. Linda still thinks it might be good for my ‘feminine development’ to experience being intimate with a man. She commented on how much I grew from my experience with Roger while in Florida. She said that it really brought out the woman in me and she liked what she saw. She made me admit that I enjoyed the experience and I agreed that I might like to try it again. However, I told her that I was not interested in a steady boyfriend just as I didn’t want her to have one either. We agreed to go slowly on me dating, just as she and Darryl would be.

She asked me if I wanted to go back to Florida to visit Roger. I told her that, while it was fun, I wasn’t in any hurry to repeat it. Then she got me to admit that I enjoyed my phone conversations with Roger. So we aren’t totally ruling out another Florida visit.

That left us with talking about where we want to be as a couple. We talked about re-building our marriage to get it strong again. We shared what we enjoyed which included me serving her many ways; from giving her personal services like manicures and pedicures, to letting her take the dominate role sexually as well as more in our everyday lives. She enjoys spanking me but doesn’t want me to spank her as she doesn’t see me in that kind of a dominate role with her. Since our friends and family knows about our wife-led marriage she doesn’t see any reason to change that, just as she sees no reason to hid Beverly away from them since they already know. So I will most likely be making more appearances as Beverly in front of our close friends and family members.

So there you have it. Your input has been useful and taken to heart. Thanks for helping out!

7 comments:

MaryMary said...

Dear Beverly,
Good to hear from you. I am glad you dealt with this issue promptly. Good for you.
Just a thought. I bet Linda could have Darryl over her lap, face down and ass up, if she wanted to.
Have fun.
MaryMary

Ms. C said...

Beverly,

I am so relieved to know you are on the path tho mending your relationship and re-establishing intimacy with Linda!

Liz Romney said...

Dear Beverly,

Très Bon! That ol' communication stuff seems to work pretty well.

XO
Liz

alan said...

I am so happy to find words from you here again, let alone these wonderful ones!

I'm very happy for the two of you!

alan

Ms. Lily said...

Hi Beverly,
I haven't commented in a while but I have been here reading and checking up to see if you have posted.
I am so glad that you had a real heart to heart with Linda about your marriage. I so believe that everyone is entitled to have their own way of living and having their marriage be what they want it to be, but agreeing on the situation as a couple and keeping that communication going as you go along is so important.
Happy for you and hope that you both continue to put your relationship first.

xoxo

Iowabev said...

Thanks to all of you for your heartfelt comments. I really appreciate you taking the time.
The strength of our marriage has always been our keeping the lines of communication open. We have always been able to talk thing through, and am glad we were able to so in this case.
Thanks again,
Bev

Nathalie said...

I'm so glad you got 'back on track' in my opinion. I judges the procedings as a one way track to disaster. Main thing I worried about was that you two had separate experiences, instead of adventures you shared. Glad to read you both see your relationship THE most important, as I can understand it's hard to keep from getting off the flow of things. The carried away kind of flow. Credits to the both of you and please keep writing, I enjoy it tremmendously.